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Bravo to our politicians – Male/Female – Comedy

DirectSubmit Monologue Database — Sat, 26 Aug 2023 19:46:37 +0000

Ideal for adult males or females, 30 – 60 years. 1 Min. Oh, bravo! Bravo to our politicians, the saviors of our great nation! How lucky are we to have such selfless individuals working tirelessly day and night… to ruin this country! Oh, the sacrifices they make, putting their personal interests aside for the greater […]

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Once Upon a Mattress – Adult Female – Comedic

DirectSubmit Monologue Database — Wed, 22 Sep 2021 21:36:36 +0000

“Well then how can you say such a thing, I want you to get married, how many times have I said to you I want you to get married.” From the musical, “Once Upon a Mattress.” The Queen assures her son of his doubts, all while lying to him about her true intentions to have […]

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The Man Who Came to Dinner – Adult Male – Comedy

DirectSubmit Monologue Database — Wed, 22 Sep 2021 20:22:14 +0000

“I am pleased to inform you, sir, that your plans for my daughter seem to have gone a trifle awry.” From the play, “The Man Who Came to Dinner.” Mr. Stanley has finally gained the upper hand on Sheridan Whiteside who has held him at legal gunpoint for the entirety of the show, forcing Stanley […]

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Rare Birds – Teen Male – Drama/Comedy

DirectSubmit Monologue Database — Tue, 06 Oct 2020 14:56:09 +0000

“Hi Jenny. Here’s a video just for you.” From the play ‘Rare Birds.’ Evan tries to summon the courage to talk to Jenny, the girl he has a massive crush on who’s Locker is next to his own. Ideal for males, 15-18 – 1-2 Minutes. By: Adam Szymkowicz EVAN: Hi Jenny. Here’s a video just for […]

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It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia – Adult Male – Comedy

DirectSubmit Monologue Database — Thu, 02 Jul 2020 17:59:51 +0000

“Now that right there is the mail.” from the TV show “Its Always Sunny in Philadelphia.” Charlie works in the mail room of the building. Later in the episode, Mac goes to talk to Charlie in the mailroom and discovers Charlie visibly stressed about a supposed conspiracy involving someone named “Pepe Silvia.” According to Charlie, he […]

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Tommy Boy – Adult Male – Comedic

DirectSubmit Monologue Database — Thu, 02 Jul 2020 17:30:39 +0000

“Uh, what my associate is trying to say is that, uh..” from the movie, ” Tommyboy”. Tommy Boy and Richard are at a meeting with a potential buyer. Richard gives him the usual pitch and when the executive tells him to make it simpler, Tommy Boy steps him, giving this manic sales pitch using models cars […]

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Wet Hot American Summer – Adult Male – Comedic

DirectSubmit Monologue Database — Tue, 28 Apr 2020 17:00:23 +0000

“I wanna thank all of you for a terrific summer.” from the film “Wet Hot American Summer” Set on the last day of camp, in the hot summer of 1981, it follows a group of counselors who are each trying to complete their unfinished business before the day ends. Ideal for Adult Males ranging from 20s-40s. 1-2 […]

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American Graffiti – Female Teen – Comedic

DirectSubmit Monologue Database — Tue, 28 Apr 2020 15:57:51 +0000

“You take me out?” from the film “American Graffiti” After her longtime boyfriend Steve tells her he’s leaving town to go to college, Laurie tries to pretend she doesn’t care. Ideal for Teen Females. 1-2 Mins. Written By: George Lucas, Gloria Katz and Willard Huyck You take me out? When we first met you didn’t have enough […]

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Easy A – Teen Male/Female – Comedic

DirectSubmit Monologue Database — Fri, 24 Apr 2020 17:41:28 +0000

“So, you’re saying I shouldn’t really have sex. I should just say I had sex with someone. A girl.” from the film “Easy A”. Brandon convinces Olive to fake having sex with him. 5-6 Min. Olive enters her bedroom with Brandon in tow. OLIVE Welcome. This is where the magic happens. And as you well know, by […]

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10 Things I Hate About You – Teen Male/Female – Comedic

DirectSubmit Monologue Database — Thu, 23 Apr 2020 17:48:28 +0000

“You know — you’re not as vile as I thought you were.” From the film “10 Things I Hate About You”. Patrick takes care of a drunk Kat, and they learn more about each other. 5-6 Min. Patrick marches Kat around the yard, holding her up. KAT This is so patronizing. PATRICK Leave it to […]

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Fast Times at Ridgemont High – Adult Females – Comedic

DirectSubmit Monologue Database — Wed, 22 Apr 2020 18:25:10 +0000

“No way! He just called him a dick.” from the film “Fast Time at Ridgemont High.” Linda & Stacy chat about high school stuff, and Linda demonstrates how to give a blow job. Ideal for Teen Females early 20s. 1-2 Mins. Written By: Cameron Crowe. STACY and LINDA: LINDA I hear some surfer pulled a knife […]

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Adam’s Rib – Adult Females – Comedic

DirectSubmit Monologue Database — Wed, 22 Apr 2020 18:17:38 +0000

“No occupation” from the film “Adam’s Rib.” Amanda interrogates Doris about the shooting of her husband. Ideal for Adult Females in their 30s. 1-2 Mins. Written By: Ruth Gordon AMANDA and DORIS: Amanda – Occupation? Doris – No occupation. A – Housewife. D – That’s right. Housewife. A – All right. D – […]

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Ally McBeal – Adult Females – Comedic

DirectSubmit Monologue Database — Wed, 22 Apr 2020 17:43:19 +0000

“Excuse me I was taking those.” from the TV show, “Ally McBeal.” Ally and a woman in the supermarket have a humorous argument about who deserves the Pringles. Ideal for Adult Females ranging from 25-30. 1-2 Mins. Written By: David E. Kelley BARBARA and ALLY: Barbara: Excuse me I was taking those . Ally: You Put them […]

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Mystic Pizza – Adult Females – Comedic

DirectSubmit Monologue Database — Wed, 22 Apr 2020 16:54:50 +0000

“Hey I’m sorry I didn’t show up.” from the film “Mystic Pizza.” Kat is late and Daisy is pissed. The sisters argue. Ideal for Adult Females in their 20s-30s. 1 Min. Written By: Amy Holden Jones KAT and DAISY: Kat: Hi Dais’. Hey I’m sorry I didn’t show up. I said I’m sorry. Why are you […]

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Stranger Than Fiction – Adult Females – Comedic

DirectSubmit Monologue Database — Wed, 22 Apr 2020 16:33:13 +0000

“Excuse me.” from the film “Stranger Than Fiction.” Penny, an assistant hired by Kay’s publisher, shows up just when Kay is trying to decide how to kill Harold in her book. She doesn’t want Penny’s help in any way, but Penny is persistent. Ideal for Adult Females in their 30s. 1-2 Mins. Written By: Zach Helm […]

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The Replacements – Adult Males – Comedic

DirectSubmit Monologue Database — Tue, 21 Apr 2020 17:33:57 +0000

“You look like a swordfish I caught once.” from the film “The Replacement.” McGinty goes to ask Shane if he will quarterback his team during the strike. Ideal for Adult Males in their 30s-50s. 1-2 Mins. Written By: Vince McKewin McGINTY and SHANE: Shane flops onto the deck of his boat, exhausted, when… McGINTY (O.S.) You look like […]

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Midnight Run – Adult Males – Comedic

DirectSubmit Monologue Database — Tue, 21 Apr 2020 17:16:48 +0000

“What are you doing?” from the film “Midnight Run.” Jonathan and Jack are eating at a diner. Jack wants Jonathan to shut up and Jonathan wants Jack to like him and let him go. Ideal for Adult Males in their 30s-40s. 1-2 Mins. Written By: George Gallo JONATHAN and JACK: JONATHON What are you doing? […]

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Dr. Strangelove – Adult Males – Comedic

DirectSubmit Monologue Database — Tue, 21 Apr 2020 17:04:56 +0000

“Listen to that.” from the film ” Dr. Strangelove.” General Jack D. Ripper, the delusional commander of a US Air Force base, initiates a plan to attack the Soviet Union with nuclear weapons, even though there is no immediate threat. Ideal for Adult Males in their 60s. 2-3 Mins. Written By: Stanley Kubrick, Terry Southern, & Peter […]

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Being John Malcovich – Adult Males – Comedic

DirectSubmit Monologue Database — Tue, 21 Apr 2020 16:49:47 +0000

“Come in, Mr. Juarez.” from the film “Being John Malcovich.” Craig gets a very strange interview from Lester. Ideal for Adult Males ranging from 30-60. 1-2 Mins. Written By: Charlie Kaufman LESTER and CRAIG: INT. LESTER’S OFFICE – CONTINUOUS Craig enters. Lester, a giant of an old man, sits hunched behind his tiny desk. […]

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DROP DEAD JULIET – Teen Male – Comedic

DirectSubmit Monologue Database — Mon, 20 Apr 2020 18:11:39 +0000

DROP DEAD JULIET – Mercutio talks about Queen Mab. Comedic Monologue for Teen Male. 1 Min. Mercutio: That queen Mab came me by. She is the fairies’ midwife, and she comes In shape no bigger than an agate stone. In the international Pancake House we sat but it wasn’t th’Pancake House, you know what dreams […]

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