ubu – Adult Male – Comedy

“Wine! Wine! Wine!” from the play,”ubu” Ubu tells us of his true love who died. Ideal from adult males ranging from 35-44. 1-2 Mins.

Written By: Adam Szymkowicz

UBU:

Wine! Wine! Wine! Wine! Wine! Wine! Wine! Wine! Wine! Wine! Wine!

(The SERVANT brings UBU wine. UBU drinks.)

A very good vintage. I would offer it to you, of course, but it would ruin you.

What else can I tell you before I fire you? Ooop. Did I say that out loud? Were you paying attention? Forget I said that. Maybe I won’t even do it. Who knows. I meant to say, what else can I tell you for your edification to help you continue to work for me?

When I was a child . . . nononono. Don’t look at me like that. I’m not some kind of animal. I’m not some kind of—I was in love once. Is that what you want to hear? It was a blemish on my career. A black spot on my rise to fame and fortune. All the profits I tried to make, she tried to take away. She wanted me to use my money to clothe people and feed people and house people and help them farm and get them clean water and give them small loans and artist grants. And I did everything she wanted. Because of love.

(The memory of the woman he loved comes out. Played by a servant? A life-sized marionette? UBU and she dance together. It is haunting and strangely beautiful.)

She was…

She was…

beautiful.

heavenly.

Her feet never touched the ground.

She made the most powerful men self conscious.

She was put together like no other.

Just meat and bone, but better. More human. Like she was built from sunlight and air.

Her existence was proof of God.

She had my heart in her hand.

And then she died.

Cancer.

(Marionette or Actor falls to the ground.)

People told me to fund Cancer research. Fuck that. I’m not giving up any more to cancer. CANCER ALREADY TOOK EVERYTHING!

 

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